It is right up there with gasoline and fire, bare feet and thumb tacks, water and electricity. Faced paced sports and alcohol have got to be one of the worst combinations known to man.
The overnight ultimate frisbee tournament I was at Saturday night saw half the people there get properly hammered and I figured that abstaining from liquor would leave me in good shape so I stayed sober but here I am in crutches with my ankle looking like there's a tennis ball stuck in it.
Some guy threw a frisbee way out of bounds but I chased it anyway and after I caught it, I caught my ankle in someone's school bag and snap crackle popped it.
So the night was done early for me, it didn't hurt very much at first but as the night went on, it looked more and more like an unassembled jigsaw puzzle so we went to the E.R.
My friend Nadine was gracious enough to wait with me for three hours.
It took forever for them to take six x-rays but how much of a spoiled sac of shit would I have to be to complain about that. Buddy ahead of me had a heart attack.
So all of a sudden, walking up the stairs in my house becomes a monumental task. My crutches are pieces of shit, I think Methuselah might have used them once, are they ever old.
Thank God this didn't happen on Kilimanjaro, good chance that would have been the end of me, no joke.
And back to the frisbee tournament, it was comical, some of the people were so wasted by the end that they forgot which team they were on. How hard do you think it was for ME to watch all that on the sidelines out of commission.